Why does 25 feel so old?! I seriously cannot believe I’m 25 today! Some days I feel like I’m still 21 and in college, other days 30 feels very close. Your 20’s really is an interesting time as you are becoming yourself and figuring out exactly what life looks like. The meme’s about how growing up people in their 20’s seemed to have it all together is really true. No one really tells you how much you just start to wing it and hope for the best as an adult and you just get really good at winging it! It’s basically what we are all here doing just trying things out, learning what works and what doesn’t.
In honor of my 25th birthday I wanted to share some lessons with y’all that I have learned (or am still learning) from my early 20s. Yes early…because I am no long in the early 20s but mid and mid is closer to not being in the 20s at all…EEP!
The Life Plan You Had Probably Isn’t Going To Happen
When I graduated college my life was in a completely different place than I thought it would be. In fact, it still looks completely different. The lesson here is that that’s okay! Most people are not going to get their dream job right out of college or get married at 22. You have time to figure things out and adding pressure to do so right now isn’t going to make any decision any easier. I’m honestly glad things didn’t work out like I had planned them to. I grew up thinking I’d go to college, get married right after, and start popping out babies by 25. News flash: I’m not even close to having children! Had that plan worked out I’d be ready for them but it didn’t and I’m pretty okay with it. I’ve learned to trust that God’s timing is much better than my own and every time I try to figure things out is when things go astray. Having a goal is really good thing, but learning to hold things with open hands and roll with change is important.
Know Your Priorities
As you go through your early twenties you start to learn what you value. For me that’s my faith, my family and the family I want to create, and this blog. When you know what’s most important to you it becomes easier to see the things and people that don’t support those priorities. If a person comes a long that doesn’t value the same things or expects me to change what I value I know instantly that we probably won’t last long in each other lives.
Invest In Friendships
Something that I recently learned and so so sooooo wish I had done a lot earlier in my life is to invest in your community. While I had friends in college and I was super involved I don’t think I really found my true friends until after I graduated. The group of girls that surrounds me now is so incredible! I love watching how we support each other, are there for one another, and truly do life together. If you can find that early on it is truly a blessing.
As you get older your friendships will start to change too. I think that freaks people out a lot, when you start losing friends. After graduating or even a little before people start to merge into new stages of life. Some of my friends have really awesome jobs and are killing it on the career front, others got married, and some have children. Everyone’s priorities start to shift and change and it’s up to each of you to keep putting effort in even when those stages of life aren’t the same. I don’t have a husband or a baby to take care of, but I can be understanding to my friends who do and find ways to relate on new levels. Not to mention I can learn so much from the fact that they are going through those stages first.
I started this point off naming it learn to spend and save, but I think budget is probably better. It’s so nice when you finally start making full paychecks from a full week of work, but blowing it all is not the way to go. Learning to pay off your bills, save a percentage, and give yourself some spending money. I’m not saying don’t ever spend any money! This is your life and you should live it. Go out to eat with your friends, buy the cute top, but stick to a budget and life within your means. Have a goal and save for something! I get to travel so much because I am constantly saving a percentage of my paycheck knowing I love to explore.
Take Care Of Yourself
This is a very very recent thing I have mastered and my therapist would be so proud. I have a designated “No” evening. While it doesn’t always happen weekly (though that is the goal) I do a pretty good job of not skipping more than two weeks without one. It’s really easy to let your schedule fill up. I get it! Time with friends, chores, seeing family, a relationship, work, a side hustle. There are TONS of really great things you can fill your time with, but taking time out of your week to relax makes a major difference in mental health. We all relax in our own ways and finding the thing that gets you to chill should be a goal. The sooner you find it the better and the more you should incorporate it into your routine.
Failure Is Okay
Whether it be a task, a job, a hobbie, a relationship, a date, it’s okay to fail! Not everything is going to work out. If everything did it wouldn’t feel like real life. There’s also a ton to learn from failure and not every fail is personal. Sometimes a first date is a first date and they never call and you can check someone off the list of the billion people in the world. Sometimes you’re not good at a hobby you really wanted to be good at but it forces you to try something else. Sometimes a long term relationship ends and you’re forced to get out of your comfort zone. Failure happens. Learn from it, grow from it, let it make you stronger.
Cheers to 25 and all that being a quarter of a century brings! What are some lessons you learned in your twenties?